In All Things Joy: A Foster Care Journey

100 Days

On May 14, 2020, newly licensed Arms of Love foster parents James and Megan received a call about three-year-old twin boys Danny and Marco*. The boys were out of the county and needed a loving foster home. The couple agreed to the placement. When the Department of Child Safety (DCS) dropped the twins off at their home, they left with the parting message, “Good luck, it has taken our entire office, five people, to try and wrangle these boys.” That statement launched them into the journey of their first foster care placement.

Around the time that Danny and Marco entered their care, the shutdown happened. All parks, restaurants, libraries and anywhere else you could think of were closed due to the pandemic. Even the church where James served as a pastor was required to close for four weeks. This meant that James and Megan, their four other children and Danny and Marco were all confined to the house.

Danny and Marco had high needs and required several forms of therapy to help them heal and develop. One of the boys was non-verbal and the other spoke words that a typical three-year-old should not know. Neither of the boys were potty trained. It was extremely challenging because all the therapy and visits with their biological family were virtual. As a brand-new foster family starting in the middle of a pandemic, they were overwhelmed caring for two little boys with great needs developmentally, physically and behaviorally.

James and Megan worked with their Arms of Love licensing specialist to come up with solutions for additional support to help with Danny and Marco. Together, they found a daycare to watch the twins and provide respite for the family. This was especially helpful because James and Megan’s oldest daughter required surgery during this season and one of their bathrooms sprung a leak, leaving the family with one working bathroom for all eight people.

Looking back, James can say with a chuckle, “It was one thing after another, it was drama and difficulty and trouble… [We were] trying to muscle through it but it was tearing us apart.” But in the moment, burnout was creeping in and Danny and Marco’s care team saw that the boys required a therapeutic foster home. God’s timing was perfect. After 100 days, the twins were transitioned into the care of a therapeutic foster family. In reflecting on that first placement, the couple shared, “It was a stressful time, but God saw us through it.”

Seeds Planted

God had planted the seeds for James and Megan to become foster parents long before they completed the licensing process. Growing up, Megan had a childhood friend whose family was a foster family. That is where her interest in foster care started. She witnessed first-hand her friend’s family and their experiences which made her want to care for children in that same way in the future. James’ experience was different. He grew up living in the effects of a broken home, and the thought of stepping into that brokenness again was not exactly enticing.

Over the years of their marriage, Megan occasionally would mention the idea of becoming foster parents. After James exited the military to answer the call to ministry and the couple had four school-aged children of their own, the Lord began to stir in both their hearts. James 1:27, along with many other passages of Scripture, began to call out to them in a new way. The timing was right and their children were old enough to understand the ministry of foster care. Their church community had several others who were either current or previous foster families. That is how James and Megan connected with their licensing worker and Arizona Baptist Children’s Services and Family Ministries. James and Megan’s involvement in foster care is their response to God’s prompting. Despite their incredibly tough first placement, they took a short break and decided to continue fostering.

Placements and Beyond

Over the last several years, the couple and their family have opened their home and hearts to many other placements and their families. They have cared for babies as young as two days old. Their desire is not just to provide a safe and loving home for the children in their care, but to be a support for their families as well. With four children of their own, James explains their heart to foster, “Our whole purpose in fostering is to care for these kids until they can go back. We are not in it to adopt; we want these families to come back together and be together.” A sweet part of their journey is the fact they aren’t doing it alone. Their families and community have wrapped around them. James shared, “It is such a ripple effect of God working through this [foster care], taking in kids to care for them. It is affecting us, our kids, our church and our extended families.” Their church community has been a support system for their family in providing meals and childcare, helping with home projects and more. James and Megan and their community have seen the Lord work in mighty ways and nearly all of their placements have ended in reunification of the child to their parents or a member of the child’s family.

James and Megan are involved in the foster care system in a variety of ways now. The couple is part of the Court Team for Infants and Toddlers, which is an initiative driven by the state to create better outcomes for children in foster care. Being on this team allows them to be a part of the continual training process for foster families in their county to help them navigate the court system and how to best advocate for children in care.

Foster care is not without challenges, but Megan describes, “It is hard, but the blessings that come out of fostering are beautiful.” James and Megan have seen God work in the lives of the children in their care and their own family. James and Megan’s story shows that God equips His people to do the work He calls them to, and the good that can be accomplished when the body of Christ comes together to provide hope and care to the most vulnerable in our communities. *Names changed

There are many ways to provide hope and care to children in foster care:

PRAY. For all those involved in the foster care system, from foster families, children in care and their families and all the workers who helping along the way.

LOVE. Are you called to foster? Consider learning more about becoming licensed or sharing the need with others.

GIVE. Your generous gift will help provide hope and care to families like James and Megan by providing them with the support they need from their licensing agency. Donate today at abcs.org/year-end.